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A Psychotic Female

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[25 Feb 2010|08:42pm]
I have met a boy....and he is wonderful :)
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[28 Nov 2009|07:04pm]
so i had a very weird dream last night. as with many of my dreams, some of the details are fuzzy and some things don't make sense, but i'm wondering what exactly it means. i was hanging out with a guy, we'll call him X. we were waiting for someone else that he or i knew to come back from going to get an engagement ring or something like that. this guy gets back with the ring and X and I are looking at it and admiring it and X decides that I should try it on so he puts it on my finger. we continue telling the guy how great it is and such and then guy goes away with the ring.

right after dude leaves, X starts flipping out because he thinks people are going to start to "talk" because they saw him put a ring on my finger. i think he's freaking out for nothing and tell him to calm down. he continues to freak and eventually leaves me by myself at whatever place we were because he thought that people were going to think something of him putting a ring on me.

it doesn't sound as strange typed out as it did when i was having this dream. i'm just wondering what it could possibly mean that i dreamt this. it was definitely an unpleasant dream and still makes my stomach upset to think about. generally when i have dreams like this, they foreshadow something that will happen in my life or lend an explanation to some situation. *sigh* not able to exactly put my finger on this one. any ideas from the peanut gallery?
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[27 Sep 2009|02:18pm]
have you ever had just a really bad day?

mine start off shitty at 5AM when i said the absolute wrongest thing to a friend that i really value. and i just wasn't thinking. i was hurt and i wasn't thinking about the appropriate time to bring something up. now i'm worried that that friendship is ruined because i was an idiot. to top off the initial being an idiot, i continued to run my mouth when i knew i should have shut up :sigh: bad moves lauren, bad moves.

on top of that, i'm trying to reformat my laptop from germany. fun game - not! product key didn't work so i contacted ari about it and he just basically (though perhaps not intentionally i hope) made me feel like shit b/c i haven't had time to call him. wonderful, check off 2 friendships from my life perhaps?

then, my dad says he needs to talk to me about food. wtf about food? excuse me? i'm 24 years old, i eat what i want. i might be fat but i have lost almost 15lbs since moving back to PA so i think im doing ok.

bad day.
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Dieting - blah [31 Jul 2009|06:45am]
So I am trying to lose weight, as I gained 15-20lbs my last year of grad school (gee thanks stress...) and I wanted to make a post of all the good diet-friendly meals that I know and love so I remember that there are foods I like to eat on a diet. I also know a bunch of you guys are or have dieted in the past and I would love input of your favorite things to eat (esp shari if you read this - that WW southwestern rice you made for catie's that one time was AWESOME and i'd love the recipe and others you might have that are good!)! I am just getting this started and will continue to add for my own benefit as I remember/discover things.

Whole wheat lender's bagel with light or FF cream cheese
Cinnamon raisin light english muffin w/ cottage cheese, banana, and a sprinkle of splenda and cinnamon
Fiber One Bar and a piece of fruit
Light English muffin w/ peanut butter

Lean Cuisine Lemongrass chicken (omg so good)
Salad w/ grilled chicken on top
Cottage cheese w/ peaches and a granola bar
Turkey sandwich w/ light bread
Can of low fat soup
Flax Pita w/ homemade chicken salad (made w/ NF yogurt and fruit)

Curried turkey burgers
Mac and cheese made w/ skim milk, light cheese, and whole wheat/smart taste pasta
Turkey kielbasa w/ onions and peppers
Chicken and black beans

No sugar pudding
Fiber One bars
100 Cal Packs

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So i did a total fangirl thing [20 Jun 2009|08:02am]
But how could I not?!?!?!

$15 for a hardcover, signed, edition of a book I've been meaning to get and read anyway??? Lemme rephrase that - signed by the author of my most favoritest books ever? I had to.

MG - I think you might be the only one who can appreciate this :)
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[25 May 2009|02:00am]
why isn't it acceptably in the adult world to just disappear and run away from life for a while? i think it would solve so many of my problems.
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[16 Apr 2009|06:48pm]
sometimes i'm pretty sure that i don't like the majority of the people that i know - including some of the ones that it's most important for me to like.
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hehehehehehehe [15 Mar 2009|07:15pm]
Ok, I think its hilarious.

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[08 Mar 2009|11:41am]
it has been a really long time since i watched betelgeuse and i found it on tv this morning. i totally forgot how funny the dinner table "day-o, daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay-o daylight come and me wan go home" scene was. omg i seriously just let out some tears laughing...

haven't laughed like that in a while.
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[20 Feb 2009|03:30pm]
i just wanted to post my new userpic honestly. because it makes me happy on the inside.

MG - did you ever finish the books? what were your thoughts???
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feeling nostalgic...but wtf is a jawn? [07 Feb 2009|04:17pm]
ahhhh home...

You've never referred to Philadelphia as anything but "Philly." And New Jersey has always been "Jersey."

You refer to Pennsylvania as "PA."

You know how to pronounce Bryn Mawr, Schuylkill, Bala Cynwyd, Duquesne, Punxsutawney, Susquehanna, and Allegheny.

You know what a "Mummer" is.

You can use the phrase "fire hall wedding reception" and not even bat an eye.

You absolutely hate T.O.

You really miss Y-100.

At least 5 people on your block have electric "candles" in all or most of their windows all year long.

Words like "hoagie", "sticky buns", "shoo-fly pie", "pierogies" and "pocketbook" actually mean something to you.

You know the time and location of every "wing night" in a 20 mile radius.

You consider an exotic vacation to be a trip to Ocean City, Virginia Beach, or Myrtle Beach.

You think very little of an Amish buggy on the road.

You’ve run up the steps to the art museum emulating Rocky at least once.

You know that Intercourse, Climax, Virginville, Paradise, Mars, and Slippery Rock, Blue Ball, and Bird in Hand are all PA towns.

You love Birch Beer.

You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

When the forecast said snow, you stayed up waiting for them to announce that school was cancelled.

You know that more than two inches of snow will at least get you a two hour delay.

You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word "snow."

You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, candy, or ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.

You think the roads in any other state are smooth.

Refer to something as "a whole nother," e.g., "That's a whole nother issue."

You punctuate every sentence with, "You know" at least twice.

You want olive oil, not mayonnaise on your hoagie.

Your favorite dessert is water ice. (pronounced "wooder" ice)

You find yourself using "yo" and "youse guys" when talking long-distance to family members.

You find yourself at a nice restaurant thinking "I wonder if they have cheese steaks?"

You visit New York and are impressed by how clean it is.

You've had more than one debate on why Wawa is better than Sheetz.

You call sprinkles on top of your ice cream cone "jimmies".

You can't imagine lunch without a Tastykake.

A vacation at the Jersey shore is better than going to an island (there's more stuff to do, plus you know everybody.)

You know where to find the Rocky statue.

You've had more than one argument over why your place for cheesesteaks is the best.

You've never been to the Liberty Bell, or the only time you were there was on a class trip in third grade.

You know what and where "Boathouse Row" is

You will buy a pretzel from anyone, anywhere without even thinking of where it was - or where his hands have been.

You can't imagine a breakfast without scrapple.

You don't know what a sub is, but you think they are trying to describe an imitation HOAGIE.

You aren't a bandwagon Sixers fan, you loved them when they sucked, and before they had A.I.

You go to The Gallery or South Street in the summer time just to chill.

You call the Dallas Cowboys the Cowgirls.

When every year a team makes it close to or to the post season and yet every year you still find your self saying i know how this is gonna end...there's always next year.

If you never took a field trip to anywhere other than the franklin institute, the zoo, the art museum, or the museum of natural science

If you listen to Preston and Steve EVERY morning.

If you know every word to the theme song from the fresh prince of Bel Air.

If you know what it means if someone refers to something as a "jawn"
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a sad day [05 Jan 2009|04:44pm]
today was the funeral for my 22 year old cousin who died in a car accident right after christmas.

it's very sad for me to not be down at home and able to go to the services. i wish i could be down there to comfort my family and hug my aunt and hug my dad.

i hadnt seen or talked to this cousin for about 8 years due to family problems between his mother and the rest of my dad's siblings, but it's still heartwrenchingly painful to know that someone so young was taken from life so quickly.

it's brought a lot of things into perspective for me - most notably driving. seatbelts matter so much. my cousin, not wearing a seatbelt, is dead. his passenger, wearing a seatbelt, walked away without a scratch.

my mom called to talk to me when she was on her way home. she went with my dad - which i think was a good idea. he needed someone to drive home with him most of all. she said he's a wreck. i wish i could be home with him to give him a hug and let him know i love him.

i don't really know what else to say. there's just an overwhelming sadness. for craig - who was too young and too full of life to die, for my aunt - a mother should never have to lose a child, for my dad - who lost a nephew and i'm sure has thought a lot about how he'd feel if he lost my brother or i, my mom - who went to the services to support a family she's known for almost 30 years and was shunned by some people because she and my dad aren't together anymore (she knew craig better than some people there and still got some shit from some people).

craig - rest well, man. i'll never forget running around and playing in your house when we were little. and i'll certainly never forget how much you bugged christin and i when we were trying to play barbies :) peace and tell grandmom i say hi and i love her.
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taken from xjenavivex (i suck at lj html lol) [01 Jan 2009|08:22pm]
Pay It Forward:

I will send a small gift to the first 10 people who leave a comment here on my LJ.

I don’t yet know what that gift will be - it could be anything: cloth, metal, paper, wood, a song, a story anything goes - but you will receive it within 365 days.

The only thing you have to do in return is "pay it forward" by making a similar agreement on your blog.
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what i learned from the nutcracker... [04 Dec 2008|11:02pm]
in order to be a ballerina male or female, one must be seriously confident in their crotch.

i have never seen so much crotch in my life.

oh yeah and it was totally awesome!
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help my eggs! [10 Oct 2008|11:58pm]
i got some dragon eggs! help them! pleeeeeease. promise is nothing evil, just a website game where i need clicks to hatch my dragons. so click on each egg.

Adopt one today!

Adopt one today!

Adopt one today!

Adopt one today!

i cant help im a geek

oh yeah and only click once per IP address cause they get sick if there's too many repeat views, heh
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anyone in PA/DE who wants to help me? :bats eyelashes: [04 Oct 2008|12:21pm]
so is there anyone in the PA/DE area that is willing to look for a dogfish head beer called theobroma for me, i would REALLY appreciate it! it isn't coming up to MA and i want it sooooo badly. it has a pic of a mayan woman dripping in chocolate on the front carrying a bowl. i neeeeed this beer and i'm sad i can't have it up here - i mean it's chocolate beer based on a 3000 year old recipe. gah!

i will pay you in eternal love and monies!

this what the bottle will have on it:

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[17 Sep 2008|01:08pm]
my puppy is the cutest ever.

yes. ari's wearing pants.

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[29 Aug 2008|07:50am]
if anyone knows of any IT/support/networking jobs available in the boston area, pleeeease let me know.

i have a very qualified boyfriend who is looking for a job currently (and having trouble finding available jobs) so any help is appreciated!
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i just bought a puppy! [27 Jul 2008|05:29pm]
ari and i just bought a puppy. we're attempting to think of names for her and failing at it. she's currently in pennsylvania. we're going to pick her up sometime around august 16. my mom is picking her up from the breeder's next weekend and she wants to know what to call her by then, so suggestions are appreciated!

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[15 Jul 2008|07:08pm]
a few hours ago i was excited about moving and now i'm just annoyed by it all.

i'm moody.
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[15 Jul 2008|03:50pm]
so ari wants to move to somerville...apparently that's where everyone i know moves to.

:looks at catie: well looky here, i might live real close to you soon - which would allow me to bother you ALL THE TIME! (seriously, we're considering a really cute place about a block from the liquor store we went to in winter hill that one time - where we got pink wine and tequila rose lol)

i've been seein a lot of condos and duplexes lately. some i really like. some are "eh".

we shall see what happens.
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book madness [28 Jun 2008|04:17pm]
have you ever been mad at a book? like to the point where you are trying to punish it by not reading it? lol for the first time i'm experiencing this.

i started reading a fantasy series (the grown up type - not a young adult one!) it's called the "song of ice and fire" series and i got so engrossed in it that i've read almost 2,000 pages in the past 2 weeks. I just started the 3rd book 2 days ago and one of the main characters has done something UNTHINKABLE and SO BAD for their side that I am just really angry about it! i honestly had to skip over much of the first chapter because i was so upset by what she did. despite my frustration and despair over this action, i find it really amusing that i am mad at the book. i'm trying to figure out if it's a good thing or not...that i'm so emotionally wrapped up in this story that i can be angry with it.

anyway, i just thought it was amusing.

i wish i were back in jamaica. i swam with dolphins. it was awesome.
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im bored soooooooo [26 Jun 2008|11:00pm]
stolen from catie "the shugah shack hizzle hizzle" howell

Look at the list and bold those you have read.
Italicize those you intend to read.
Underline the books you LOVE.
Reprint this list in your own LJ so we can try and track down these people who've read and force books upon them

1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6. The Bible
7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott,
12. Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare
15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19. The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25. The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34. Emma - Jane Austen
35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38. Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40. Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41. Animal Farm - George Orwell
42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44. A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48. The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50. Atonement - Ian McEwan
51. Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52. Dune - Frank Herbert
53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60. Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68. Bridget Jones' Diary - Helen Fielding
69. Midnight's Children - Salman Rushd
71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75. Ulysses - James Joyce
76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78. Germinal - Emile Zola
79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80. Possession - AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte's Web - EB White
88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad (booooo tatum!)
92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks i just finished reading it today...weird
94. Watership Down - Richard Adams
95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo
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ahahahahhahaha [28 May 2008|02:45pm]

brought to you by

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:sigh: [27 May 2008|09:48pm]
so sometimes i feel like i'm the only fat girl who didn't get thin during/after college. not for lack of trying. i've been dieting and exercising for the past few years of my life...lost a little bit of weight, but never could get anything serious off and it all would come back if i strayed even SLIGHTLY off a strict diet.

it's always bothered me. so after 5 months of going to the gym 3-4 times a week pretty religiously, eating quite healthy and keeping track of calories, i've gained 5 lbs. it is REALLY distressing.

i'm exasperated! doctors want me to get my thyroid checked to see if that is having any effect because even they are baffled. i hate having bloodwork done so i keep putting this off.

i'm jealous. of everyone who has had hard work pay off. thats not to say i'm not happy for them too...i just feel like i'm the only girl left in fatsville.
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temptation and a request from ALL of you! [24 May 2008|12:32am]
i'm tempted:

go see duran duran for $40 (tickets that are usually $70 but discounted to BU students cause it's at agganis)...

i'm seriously contemplating. i havent heard their new record but it was produced by timbaland and i'm SURe they will have to do SOME of the oldies...


I need books to read! I just read everything by Philipp Pullman (and loved every minute of it) and now I need new books to read that arent textbooks! Anything you've read recently and liked...tell me about it!!!
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my userpic sums up my feelings [20 May 2008|02:01pm]
starting july 1, my life is going to be MISERABLE.

No days off during the week and shit-tons of schoolwork.

On top of schoolwork 3 days a week I'm working at a hospital and doing alllllllll the SLP paperwork as well as interviews and evals and therapy. I'm gonna die. on the bright side i get hospital ID badges and parking permissions. woop woop

Once fall comes, I will be doing the hospital thing PLUS 18 credits of classes.

dear god, if there was ever a time i needed your help, it's totally now.

on a happy note, BU almost screwed me on my loans again and didnt give me anything, but then they did so that was a minor crisis averted.
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giggles brought to you by blair [25 Apr 2008|10:10pm]

i'm amused
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blah [04 Apr 2008|09:30am]
sometimes i want to be angry about something so i am. and then later i don't want to be angry about it anymore, but at that point it's out of my control.

other times i don't want to be upset about something, but i am anyway. like my mind is at war with itself over an issue.

it's easy to blame other people for our own shortcomings.

it's also easy to get paranoid and protective over things we love.

i wish this wasn't a problem i was having, but it is.

and it sucks.
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life is so hectic... [25 Mar 2008|03:22pm]
gosh, it's been forever, hasnt it lj?

life has been crazy. school takes up all my time with projects. for example right now i have a case study to write (15 pages analyzing a kid's scores on tests and including literature back up for everything we say UGH), a paper on PACE therapy to write (10 pages for an aphasia handbook), research on child stroke and a paper on it, a therapy session to make up as my client has canceled too many times, a treatment plan to revise (10 pages of analyzing my client's test scores and drawing conclusions and planning out everything i do in therapy), M-TEL on Saturday (test to teach in massachusetts), and shoot myself in the head.

money is scarce and it sucks. i can't afford to do or buy anything at all. but that's ok cause i don't have time to go anywhere in order to spend money!

my boyfriend is still the most wonderful person in the world, though his life is rather hectic right now as well.

full moons - they sure do know how to get ya.
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